Voices from the Other Side: ef ~melodies~ Episode 6
I’m Akira. Haven’t written much on this blog before, but those of you who know me know that I’m NHRV’s resident Japanese-speaking reviewer and niche anime geek. In addition to filling a role as the resident weirdo, I’m also a translator and fansubber. In this not-so-regularly updated series, I will strive to answer your questions on the supply side of the anime fandom. If you ever wanted a translator’s perspective on the fandom, here’s your chance. (WARNING: MAJOR ef ~melodies~ episode six spoilers!)
In this, my first article, I’m going to discuss one of my favorite series, ef. I’ve been a huge fan of the series ever since it first came out, having played both games, watched both anime adaptations and I own a large amount of ef paraphernalia. When ef ~a tale of melodies~ came out, I knew I wanted to be part of the translation process.
As a TLC (translation checker), my main job consists of making sure there are no errors in translation. In addition, I’m in charge of all the German in the series, as I also speak German reasonably well. Being a native speaker of Japanese, however, I’m called up from time to time to translate more difficult passages or fill in gaps in translation. One such occasion occurred this week, when I was called upon to translate parts of episode 6 of ef ~a tale of melodies.~
My main task was to fill in the last three minutes before the ED. Not a hard task, I originally thought, until I actually watched the episode.
At that point, I said to myself, “Oh, shit.“
Having played both games, I wasn’t surprised at what happened; I was surprised at the execution. The sheer beauty, chill and power of Yamada Yuna‘s voice, haunting, pleading, pathetic, desperate. To be honest, I didn’t want to do it; I thought no degree of translation could do that voice justice. My friends who have watched the episode agree with me, I’m sure; I found myself not looking at the translation at all, and simply being drawn in by her voice. It doesn’t take the translation to understand the horror of what has transpired in the life of Amamiya Yuuko. One listen to that voice, and one can tell immediately. This is a broken, shattered, hurt woman, a replacement for a dead loved one. She is no more than an object to be used and abused. I kept that point in mind as I sat down in front of my word processor and began to record her rambling monologue, word for word.
Fast-forward. I finally caught every word (after about an hour’s worth or so of listening repeatedly, and hiatuses in the middle) and began to think of a way to render all this poetry into English.
My approach was simple: I wanted to keep it sparse, clean and repetitive. I felt the rhythm of Yuuko’s confession was important, so I chose to stick to a fairly regular rhythm which lapses in and out of anaphora every once in a while to describe her unstable mental shape; after all, she is confessing to being brutally raped. I didn’t want to make the entire section completely congruous, as I feel a speech like hers shouldn’t sound pre-planned or fake. I had originally envisioned the complete absence of punctuation marks as the tirade went on, her speaking got faster and faster, and the screen moved faster and faster. Alas, that idea was ultimately shot down; commas were kept after each sentence. In a way, perhaps it was a good move?
I also tried my very best to never re-use an adjective or participle until the final section of her monologue when she says “Beaten again, ravaged again… etc.” I felt that it was important that rhythm be preserved, but at the same time, all sorts of different adjectives be used to describe the multifaceted way in which she was mentally and physically destroyed. I was fresh out of synonyms for rape by the end of the session, that was for sure.
I debated with my compatriots over how to time the scene; I had originally advocated for a three-line “Star Wars” style scrolling subtitle, rolling faster and faster as Yuuko’s speech went on. Unfortunately, that couldn’t materialize either, so we simply timed each word one by one, having words flash on and off the screen as her speech became more and more incoherent and more and more hysterical. I thought that worked out pretty well, too.
Ultimately, those two minutes amounted to about four hours of work. I like the end result very much, and I hope all of you watching the show will enjoy that scene as much as I enjoyed translating it. It was a very emotional moment in the development of the series and Yuuko’s personal history, and I tried the best I could to emulate Japanese sentence structures in English.
Questions? Comments? Anything I could have done better? Constructive debate is appreciated.
Nothing that I can think of. Not if you worked on the fansub I think you did. (I didn’t realize you worked on fansubs. I knew you translated, but I didn’t realize it was fansubs. You need to tell us these things. :p)
It was an amazing scene, and it did require a careful approach to how it was subbed. The minimalist, rhythmic method of flashing short phrases on the screen was probably the best way to do it. I think the Star Wars sub scrolling could have come off as a bit corny. There’s probably no point to forcing any of the text to linger since the power of the scene alone managed to do that by itself.
It still amazes me how much time translators need to dedicate to their craft. An hour to do a three minute scene? Granted, I’d guess it’s probably one of the toughest scenes you’ve translated, but nonetheless. It was a good job. For a scene like that, you don’t want to be distracted by subs. You want to be so absorbed that you don’t even realize you’re reading subs. I’d say you achieved that.
“I didn’t realize you worked on fansubs.”
Actually, it’s my fault he got involved in this kind of thing in the first place. XD